Mrtzcmp3
  • DFTBA
  • The Deep Sea Anglerfish
  • A Song about an Anglerfish
  • Strange Charm
  • This Is Not Harry Potter
  • Accio Deathly Hallows
  • This Isn't Hogwarts
  • I Know
  • Shake-A-Booty
  • Looking for Alaska
  • Nerdfighteria Island
  • Book Eight
  • I'm Gonna Kill You
  • Helen Hunt
  • I'm not Edward Cullen
  • Nerdfighterlike
  • Mules are so Half Ass
  • It All Makes Sense At The End
  • It's Too Hot
  • What Would Captain Picard Do
  • Phineas Gage
  • Fermi Paradox
  • Protons and Neutrons
  • Crime Dramas Suck
  • Dead Boy's Girlfriend
  • Scuzzy Kizoozle Curl
  • Accio Deathly Hallows (Acoustic)
  • The Fathers of the Founding Fathers
  • Brother from a Mother of a Last Name of Another Color
  • Ulcerative Colitis
  • My Phone
  • Edward Spoonhands
  • Jesus Gets Nothing For Christmas
  • Bad Day On Chat Roulette
  • Adult Female
  • Farmville
  • Makin' Babies
  • Obama Llama Song
  • Luck of my Life
  • Queen Ranavalona I
  • The Vegetables
  • Helena Montana
  • Good Morning Nerdfighters
  • Demolition Derby
  • Butte Montana
  • Brigid and Samantha
  • The Worst of News 2009
  • People Who Love Giraffes
  • Accio Deathly Hallows (Annotated)
  • Amber Lamps

I'd like to do some calculations
In the hopes that I'll come to some realizations.
My mind is not what it used to be,
That certainly isn't news to me,
But I want to know how my life was spent
Now that I know that I'm near the end.
So I add, subtract, multiply, and divide
To try and figure out what I did with my life.

I spent twenty-seven years in my bed,
And there's not much that I would've preferred to do instead.
I spent two years chewing, and six months wooing,
And, I'm sure you're curious, almost three years pooing.
I spent twenty-five years working for a guy,
That I wanted to kill when I didn't want to die,
But I spent fifty-seven years loving you my friend,
So I guess it all makes sense at the end.

...

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